memories

The following post appears in December 4 issue of The Projector.

The strangest Christmas I had was spent in Brighton, England. My flatmates had left for the holiday, gone north to see family and such. I remember how much I was looking forward to being alone, a strange Christmas wish for someone with not much more than a backpack full of clothes. Maybe I was instinctively asking for something I was already going to get. The house was mine for a few days. The cold sea weather smothered everything in grey gloom. I liked it.

Christmas Eve, I volunteered to work at this place called the Funky Buddha Lounge – it was a dance club with a capacity of about 150 people – located in the arches along Brighton Beach. If you saw the film Quadrophenia then you might be familiar with the brick arches on the beachfront. The Buddha is small and dark and its patrons are usually quite classy. On this intimate Wednesday everyone was infectiously merry but still, I embraced solitude as it came to me.

When the dancers left and the club was clean, the few staff that remained started having drinks. Ellie, the manager who almost kissed me twice, handed out presents, trinkets and booze. I drank and drank and drank. So did everyone else. In a place so far away from family, so distant from any holiday ritual, I felt at home. I embraced each breath of the stale, alcohol filled air, and wanted to grasp it in my hands, stuff it into my pockets and take it back to the flat with me.

I didn’t get home and into bed until after 7:00 a.m on Christmas morning where I immediately fell into a heavy drunken slumber. When I woke it was dark. I was confused. Lonely. Scared. I had no idea what was going on, or what time it was. I didn’t know if I was dreaming or if this was a manipulation of my consciousness. I looked at my phone, it was 5:00 p.m. and there were seven missed calls. My parents and others tried to wish me a merry Christmas but in some self-prophecy, I missed Christmas altogether and spent it alone. Sitting on the edge of my bed I tried to gather my thoughts, slowly collecting each one as I retraced memories of what happened about 12 hours earlier. Without thinking I remember grabbing my pillow, clenching it in my fingers, placing it over my face and screaming as loud and long as I could.

Tunes from the era:
Mysterymen – Electromode
Devo – The Day My Baby Gave Me a Surprise
Avenue D – Do I Look Like a Slut?

promotion

Hey, sorry for this lame-o post, but I’m trying to generate more traffic so I subscribed to this syndication thing…

http://www.technorati.com/profile/manalogue

So, yay for spam cuz I’m sure it’s coming my way.

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As consolation for this post though, here are two tracks from Atomizer, the duo who started NagNagNag, the loosest club night in London.

Atomizer – Snake X Booty

Atomizer – Violence


Hello, guys. If you are MDs or Radio djs or if you have a paper to write a review in, please read this. My name is Mitz and I have lived in Canada for last 9 years since high school. I had a student Visa and now i finished school and I have a tourist visa right now. But i cant work in canada right now so I was looking into all the options of getting permanet residency and seems like only way is that I apply for an aritist visa. for that, I need some kinda of reference or reviews etc to show the immigration that I can be successful(I dont expect to make living out of it. i know that EP is not that good.) All i need is that I get a permanet residency so that I can stay in canada and work freely. After i get it, immigration wont ask for what im doing.

So if you can spare little time to write up some kinda of formal review with your title, that would save my stay in canada.

please help me. I love smoked salmon and bears and mooses. i wanna stay here.

love

Mitz

I first met Mitz at the University of Lethbridge. He was this crazy kid from Japan who was impossible not to like. Mitz still is a crazy kid from Japan and still is one of the greatest people I’ve met. Seriously, the guy is awesome. Definitively, he is partyfuntime. Check out his photos if you don’t believe me.


He’s in a band called Soy Captain, and they’ve released one ep that shows alot of potential. It’s a bit unrefined in places, but I’m convinced they’ll move on to make great music. This isn’t meant to sound insulting, but Soy Captain is simply in an incubational phaze. Yes they are growing, maturing, and mastering their techniques. Please check them out and if you care to write a review, please send it to them.

work stations

My school has a print, radio, and tv newsroom workstation, a public relations and advertising agency workstation, and a radio and television broadcast workstation. It’s like kindergarten all over again. Sometimes I feel as though I am five-years-old again and led by hand-holding instructors. I will be in a better position after I’m done the program, but the guidance at school can choke me a bit at times; I am scared to fall out of line. Sometimes I think I’m only half of who I am. Other times I have to question the validity and importance of some of the activities. More freedom is needed in order for students to get more out of the program than the instructors do. Honestly, the hype with the program does not meet what actually happens here.

I need to forget about all the negative stuff and work on my optimism. Holy fuck, i think I’m at the point of destruction unless I start working my ass off. I’ve been thinking a lot about my Mum and what she thought when people kept telling her she’s going to die a painful fucking death, basically suffocating herself over a few years. During that time she truly believed there will always be another breath; she was in complete denial of what smoking did to her health. As she walked from the bathroom, back to her room, she collapsed, but from the bruising left on her cold body she did try to brace herself before she hit the floor. What the fuck was she thinking of then, as she lay on the floor, dying?

I should stop destroying myself. Maybe I’ll start tomorrow.

- going fucking nuts

I love you Mum. Come visit me sometime.

check it before you wreck it.

I’ve been waiting for the perfect occasion to post this, but honestly there will be nothing better. This track has my fucking name in it. “Jack Rach…Jack, jack to the beat. Give me my rhythm let me jump on my feet…Rach, rock to the beat. Jack Rach, rock it for me. Rach. Rock to the beat…”

This totally feeds my deflated ego, but fuck. Seriously. If you had your first and last name (phonetically at least) in any song, you’d be all over it.

So give me this. It’s fucking wikkid.

Cassius – Jack Rock.mp3

Cassius on myspace.